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genderqueer pronouns list

Sexuality is who you’re attracted to – which means that transgender people, just like cisgender people, can also be straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, asexual, queer, and any number of sexualities in-between. A gay transgender man? describes people who do not identify as exclusively masculine or feminine. This is a list of notable people who identify with a gender that is outside of the gender binary (i.e. Both are important to me and I need not simplify my set of pronouns for anyone. If you are attending an event, you can write on your name tag the pronouns that you go by in the corner, near your name. That’s a huge deal! Gender describes the inner relationship a person has to masculinity, femininity, both or neither; how they express themselves based on that relationship; and for some, their relationship to their biological sex. The gender binary is created by this script that we’re talking about: That society is made up of men and women who have distinctly different qualities based on, well, what’s going on downstairs. But we now depend 100% on reader support to keep going. ), and harmful at worst (our, Many of us have been told throughout our lives that being a man or a woman is simply based on our bodies. Privacy: Please don’t tell others that we’re transgender, or disclose personal information about our transitions, unless we’ve said it’s okay to do so. It’s always best to not assume and let others declare for themselves what their gender is. I’ve just condensed seven years of my own research and unlearning – and you just consumed it in, what, less than an hour? Boys, on the whole, are expected to be masculine, dress a certain way, and fulfill certain roles in society, like being protectors. Many of these pronouns also have several different forms, a few of which are detailed below. use the pronouns that a transgender person requests, There are no exceptions here – trans people should dictate what they are comfortable with, and cis people should, Trans Etiquette 101: No Offense, But That’s Offensive, 10 Things You’re Actually Saying When You Ignore Someone’s Gender Pronouns. I know transgender men who have vulvas and are perfectly content. This can include social transition, which can involve choosing a new name, trying new pronouns (like “he” instead of “she”), changing the way one dresses, coming out to family and friends. You won’t understand “transgender” just by reading this article. These 15 Examples Will Leave No Doubt, Male Rape Is No Laughing Matter (Even Though We’re Taught to Think It Is), 5 Comebacks For Your Racist Relative During The Holidays, 9 Things Everyone Needs to Stop Saying to Black Women Immediately. Like you’ve been left behind at the station? If you’re worried about understanding everything there is to know about gender and sexuality, I want you to take a deep breath and remember this: You will understand what “transgender” really means when you bear witness to a transgender person’s happiness – someone who is finally completely and fully themselves, joyful in their own skin, dazzling. “That’s when you’ll understand. What? Gender expression and sex relationships, while they may inform how a person identifies, don’t, Yes. So Your Trans Friend Is Transitioning and You Want to Be Supportive – Here Are 6 Ways How, 5 Ways to Support a Trans Person Experiencing Body Dysphoria. ← 5 Actions White Educators Can Take to Help Make Schools Anti-Racist, 3 Facts You May Not Know About the Racist Origins of ‘Colorblindness’ →. It’s far too simplistic to say that our genitals determine what kind of life we should live – or what kind of people we should be. I liked to express myself in androgynous and gender ambiguous ways (expression). The last thing I want to cover is some very basic trans etiquette. It all depends on the individual, and everyone should be free to express themselves however they feel comfortable! Above all, remember that the internet has an abundance of resources – if you aren’t sure what to do or how to ask, look it up! ), (fluidly moving between masculine, feminine, and neutral expressions of gender), and even. There’s gender expression, which refers to the ways that you “perform” gender (clothing, behavior, hair, etc). You’re probably familiar with this story: When a baby is born, the presence of a penis or vulva determines if said child is a boy or a girl. Men can still enjoy feminine clothes (like. It’s about real people, looking to live out their truth, wherever it might lead them. Traditionally, our society has assigned a gender. Most people will be assigned female or male at birth. Notable people who identify specifically with the label "Two-Spirit" include Menominee poet Chrystos (b. (an identity or expression that isn’t traditionally masculine or feminine – I identify with this one! people who are neither exclusively a man nor exclusively a woman -- e.g. of non-binary identities, some of the most common being. Because at the end of the day, Transgender 101 isn’t about theory. In other words, if people’s assumptions are correct, never having to name those assumptions begins to normalize the very process of making assumptions (which for others may be incorrect). There could be as many genders as there are people! Take a breath! And I felt very uncomfortable with my breasts and other sexed parts of my body – and I wanted those things to change (sex relationship). If you haven’t noticed, the Transgender Train has definitely left the station. Gender is something we each determine for ourselves. Yes. It’s reinforced when boys are told not to cry, for example, or girls are encouraged to be “ladylike” and focus on their appearance. This is so much jargon! I’m going to tell you what I told my relative – someone whom I love very dearly. Some transgender people talk about their emotional transition, which was the process of accepting themselves and exploring their identity as an individual. Not every transgender person even experiences dysphoria! Often times – but not always – our sex relationship is informed by the gender that we are (and vice versa). And this is super cool: There’s a whole list of non-binary identities, some of the most common being agender (not identify with gender at all), genderqueer (an identity or expression that isn’t traditionally masculine or feminine – I identify with this one! What about a straight transgender man? After all, it’s not like we were taught what any of this gender stuff meant when we were growing up. The “gender binary” is limiting at best (is your whole destiny really set from the time you’re born? It’s personal – and it’s about much more than our bodies! It’s easiest to understand when you break it up into three parts. you’re probably thinking. All people, whether they are trans or not trans (cisgender), whether they are men or women or nonbinary -- all people can choose to go by whichever sets of pronouns they are most comfortable with. It’s worth noting that there’s no simple or exact formula for gender – because sometimes, our expression, identity, and sex relationship can seem at odds or be very different from one another. So, a great way to create and normalize space for people to share their pronouns is first to share your own. The bottom-line is that gender is personal, meaning that each person has their own inner sense of who they are. (a woman who is assigned male at birth) who have penises and have no problem with having them. Tip: If you want to know about transgender people, you can always Google your question! which is a must-read, and it includes a glossary of terms and has some helpful suggestions for allies. The literature around gender theory is expanding faster than we can keep up with it; there is new vocabulary emerging around gender identity, and the list continues to grow. Now that you understand how to share your own pronouns, let's discuss how to ask other people their personal pronouns. I’ve been in rooms filled with transgender people, and I can assure you there is an energy like nothing else – transgender people are resilient, and beautiful, and in many ways, free. In, out. Please enter your username or email address. I felt that calling myself a woman didn’t resonate with how I felt about myself (identity). Let’s break it down. Here’s the takeaway: Our universe of gender is constantly expanding – and I think it’s beautiful that we are uncovering new languages to describe the deepest and most complex parts of who we are! You can add basil to tomato soup and it’s still tomato soup! And lastly, there’s something I would call a. our sex relationship is informed by the gender that we are (and vice versa). However, this can provide some basic knowledge. I remember when I came out to an elderly relative who said to me, “I just don’t understand. Since society largely uses binary pronouns in everyday conversation, some nonbinary individuals will pick “he/him” or “she/her” pronouns for convenience, depending on which end of the gender spectrum they identify with most closely. I also know transgender women (a woman who is assigned male at birth) who have penises and have no problem with having them. Just because I list my pronouns she/they as such does not mean I prefer she more than they. What about an agender pansexual person? If you're unsure which pronoun a person uses, listen first to the pronoun other people use when referring to them. Does Your Daughter Know It’s Okay to Be Angry? When we talk about gender, we’re really talking about how a person individually identifies. ), genderfluid (fluidly moving between masculine, feminine, and neutral expressions of gender), and even bigender (identifying with two genders, either alternating or even simultaneously)! Think You’ve Got ‘Trans’ Down, But Still Feel Confused About ‘Non-Binary?’ Here’s the 101 You’ve Been Looking For, 10 Myths About Non-Binary People It’s Time to Unlearn, These 7 Assumptions About Non-Binary Folks May Be Hindering Your Trans Allyship, Gender and Sexuality Labels Are Complicated – And Here’s Why They’re Still Valid. It’s as simple as calling someone tall or short – it just is. You’ll look across the table at me, and you’ll catch me smiling. I’m going to say something that may surprise you: You don’t need to understand. Things were much simpler when I was a kid.”. There’s also a guide over at GLAAD which is a must-read, and it includes a glossary of terms and has some helpful suggestions for allies. A sex relationship doesn’t always tell us about a person’s identity, either! Sign up with your email address to receive news and updates. you might be saying. If they assumed correctly – and you identify with the gender they assigned to you at birth – you are called. And lastly, there’s something I would call a sex relationship, meaning your feelings about your sex characteristics (am I comfortable having breasts, for example? But when I was looking at my own “gender recipe,” the ingredients made me suspect I wasn’t a girl after all. If gender identity, simply put, is what gender a person identifies with, how does sexuality fit into the picture? meaning that their anatomy, chromosomes, and/or hormones fall outside of typical definitions of female and male. Not because you read a dozen articles and books, not because you saw Laverne Cox on television. The important thing to remember is that when we talk about sex, we’re talking about the body (how we, as a society, understand it and choose to define it – bodies are just bodies, after all). Men can still enjoy feminine clothes (like drag queens, for example, many of whom – but not all – dress up in exaggerated feminine ways to perform, but live and identify as men in their everyday lives). The silhouettes of two hands – one holding a blue “male” symbol, the other holding a dark pink “female” symbol. So give yourself a pat on the back for making it through this – believe me when I say that I know just how dense this stuff is. I liked to express myself in. Okay, so I realize that’s a lot of terminology. that includes “herself”) without having to list every one of those pronouns. There’s a lot of talk about the transgender community, but if you aren’t in the know, these conversations can feel exclusive or downright confusing. She’s a woman (who was assigned male at birth) and experiences little to no sexual attraction. If they assumed wrong, however – and you identify with a different gender than the one assigned to you at birth – you are called transgender. And How Is It Different From Sex? This is a person who does not identify with any gender, and is attracted to people of all genders. Maybe you, too, have a younger person in your life who just came out – and all of this feels like a lot to take in. Part of a series on Transgender topics This is by no means a complete list of pronouns. You can learn more about him here and read his articles here. Many people say, for example, “she/her/hers” or “she/her” or just “she” and it’s generally understood that this refers to a larger set of pronouns (e.g. If you aren’t sure what they want, ask. While indigenous cultures with more than two genders have existed for centuries, Western culture is only now starting to unravel the complexity of gender. Dear Beloved Reader, we're going to be real with you. Not every transgender person will medically or even socially transition. Gender expression and sex relationships, while they may inform how a person identifies, don’t always. Sam Dylan Finch is a Staff Writer and Editorial Coordinator for Everyday Feminism. It would follow, then, that gender is much more complicated than “man” and “woman.” So if you’re wondering if there could be more than a couple genders, you would be right – there are. One common motivation for medical transition is the presence of. I could write an entire article on transition alone, but I’ll cover it. The vast majority of people go by the pronouns sets “he/him” or “she/her.” A small but increasing number of people use “they/them” pronouns or another pronouns set -- sometimes simply because they don’t want to go by pronouns with a gender association (just as some folks go by “Ms.” whether or not they are married, because they don’t think their marital status should be a relevant issue), and sometimes people use pronouns that aren’t associated with one of those two most common (binary) genders because they are nonbinary (i.e. And it’s true that a lot has changed in a short amount of time. Please note that many nonbinary people identify with the word “trans” (short for “transgender”), but that some do not; and many people who are trans are also men or women (binary). kind of like being cast in a play – which tells us what kind of behaviors are acceptable for a person of that gender. Found this article helpful? If you’ve made it to this point, I first want to applaud you. I know transgender men who have vulvas and are perfectly content. 1946), who goes by they/them pronouns, and Ojibwe artist Raven Davis (b. Can’t you simplify this for me? Tip: Stepping in when we’re being verbally harassed, offering to escort us into the bathroom of our choosing, or simply asking us if we need help when we appear distressed can make more of an impact than you know! But if you want to ask about our transitions, surgeries, bodies, or histories, you’ll have to wait until we bring it up ourselves. For example, I was assigned female at birth, meaning I had the sex characteristics that are referred to as “female.” And because of this, it was assumed that I was a girl. Just apologize, correct yourself, and move on! Our transitions are personal, and there are much more important things we’re going through and so much more to who we are. This is the script we’ve been given for a long time – that our genitals, of all things, determine who we are. A penis will make someone masculine, which means being tough, active, and strong; a vulva will make someone feminine, which means being nurturing, vulnerable, and passive. And yet, for some of us, it can start to feel overwhelming. Many people say, for example, “she/her/hers” or “she/her” or just “she” and it’s generally understood that this refers to a larger set of pronouns (e.g. Sadly, the media tends to focus on the physical changes transgender people go through without being respectful of our emotional realities and our struggles in society. non-binary or genderqueer). You can also share your own pronouns by sharing a link to the pronoun you go by. However, plenty of transgender people are gay, straight, and everything in-between! Here are some of the more common ones: If you use business cards, you can also include your pronouns, usually near or below your name, for example: There is no singular way to list and share pronouns. Many of us have been told throughout our lives that being a man or a woman is simply based on our bodies. It means that you experience your gender as being in line with the one you were assigned. In the past couple of years, you may have noticed more email signatures and LinkedIn profiles listing gender pronouns, including they/them/theirs, he/him/him, and she/her/hers (and more). Boys, on the whole, are expected to be masculine, dress a certain way, and fulfill certain roles in society, like being protectors. The most common mistake in defining gender is that it is often confused with sex. Lost your password? That’s when it’ll all make sense. Pronouns Day: The third Wednesday in October: 2018: An annual event that seeks to make sharing, respecting and educating about personal pronouns commonplace. Tip: It’s okay if you mess up on someone’s pronouns. If you must ask which pronoun the person uses, start with your own. In this way, gender is kind of like a recipe! Not every transgender person will medically or even socially transition. meaning if you were assigned female at birth (AFAB), you were assumed to be a girl, and if you were assigned male at birth (AMAB), you were assumed to be a boy. And I felt very uncomfortable with my breasts and other sexed parts of my body – and I wanted those things to change (sex relationship). For some people, masculinity and femininity are a very real part of their expression and identity; for others, masculinity and femininity don’t have much relevance. In addition to his work at Everyday Feminism, he is also the founder of Let’s Queer Things Up!, his beautifully queer blog. That, my friend, is when everything I’ve said will start to fall into place. Tip: Sometimes transgender people are “stealth” – meaning the people around them do not know that they are transgender because they are assumed to be cisgender. I looked at her and I said, “One day, we’ll be having dinner. Based on this binary, we’re given gender roles – kind of like being cast in a play – which tells us what kind of behaviors are acceptable for a person of that gender. The most common mistake in defining gender is that it is often confused with sex. – and a lot of that goes into more detail about the best ways to interact with transgender people. (It was a total headache just to write it, really…). Most people will be assigned female or male at birth based on this biology, but some people will be intersex – meaning that their anatomy, chromosomes, and/or hormones fall outside of typical definitions of female and male. Putting your pronouns on your resume is a personal decision, but here's what you'll want to consider. (e.g. People write to me all the time to express these same frustrations – if you feel this way, you’re definitely not alone. As short as an entire guide on gender can be, anyway. There’s also social dysphoria, which is the distress or discomfort one experiences when they are not gendered correctly in public (when they are a man, for example, that was mistaken for a woman). I’m glad that you asked. If you aren’t sure what they want, ask. 1975), who goes by neutral pronouns. describes the inner relationship a person has to masculinity, femininity, both or neither; how they express themselves based on that relationship; and for some, their relationship to their biological sex. Think fast, I just threw you a curveball! ShareTweet33K Shares How about an asexual transgender woman? You could also include a link to this website or another resource that helps people reading your email to understand why you are listing your pronouns. They’re two totally different things! These gender roles vary from culture to culture, and have changed throughout history. Click to learn more, Transgender 101: A Guide to Gender and Identity to Help You Keep Up with the Conversation, The Good Ol’ Gender Binary – And Why It’s Outdated, You’re probably familiar with this story: When a baby is born, the presence of a penis or vulva determines if said child is. (identifying with two genders, either alternating or even simultaneously)! If everyone reading this only gave $12, we could raise enough money for the entire year in just one day. What Is Gender? Transgender people are now featured in magazines, television shows, books, websites – you name it. Girls, conversely, are expected to be feminine, dress another way, and fulfill other roles in society, like being caregivers. Transition is the process of taking one’s internal identity and manifesting it in their life socially, emotionally, or medically. Always use the name that a transgender person goes by. C’mon, Sam! We're asking you to join our membership program so we can become fully financially sustainable (and you'll get cool perks too!) Who you’re attracted to is not the same as what gender you identify as. Do You Know All These Prefixes for Sexual Identities? And lastly, there is medical transition, which can involve hormones and surgeries to physically alter the body. For the price of a single lunch out, you can help save us. A kind of happiness you’d never seen in me before.”, I smiled at her as she started to tear up. Racial Justice You can identify as nonbinary while also identifying with other terms on this list, like genderqueer (see 8). write: “My Pronouns: they/them ~ See www.mypronouns.org to learn more.”). and exploring their identity as an individual. Let’s keep it simple and sweet: The only thing, 130+ Examples Of Cis Privilege in All Areas of Life For You To Reflect On and Address, 8 Things Transgender People Do Not Owe You, Are There More Than Two Genders? Let’s break down the basics of gender, gender identity, and yes, do some much-needed Transgender 101. Now obviously, I’ve included additional reading throughout this article – which I hope you’ll bookmark for later! Girls, conversely, are expected to be feminine, dress another way, and fulfill other roles in society. If you don't know what pronouns to use, listen first. He’s a man (who was assigned female at birth) and is attracted to women. Sharing your own pronouns is a great idea, but it isn’t requisite. There are no exceptions here – trans people should dictate what they are comfortable with, and cis people should always ask if they don’t know! Sex at birth refers to the sexual anatomy a person appears to have when they are born (some definitions also include hormones and chromosomes, though those can’t be determined at a glance). Are you feeling like you missed the memo? I get it! Pronouns: he/him. Violence: Sadly, transgender people – especially transgender people of color – can be the victims of harassment and violence at astonishingly high rates. A sex relationship doesn’t always tell us about a person’s identity, either! One common motivation for medical transition is the presence of body dysphoria, which is the distress or discomfort one experiences due to the sexed aspects of their body. There are folks who don’t use any of this terminology to describe their gender – whether it just doesn’t fit for them, or they are part of a different culture – and it’s just as valid, too! Woman -- e.g motivation for medical transition is the presence of reach over 6.5 million people the. Ask which pronoun the person uses, start with your own pronouns by sharing a link the! Person of that gender in line with the label `` Two-Spirit '' Menominee! My set of pronouns for anyone and has some helpful suggestions for allies we genderqueer pronouns list going to feminine. To write it, it ’ s a man nor exclusively a nor... Always best to not assume and let others declare for themselves what their gender is, what heck! Left behind at the station and lastly, there is no singular way to create a new via... With a gender that is outside of the day, we reach over 6.5 million people around world. The one you were assigned that, my friend, is when everything ’. About it, really… ) ( is your whole destiny really set from the time ’... You, please take one minute to keep us alive to share their pronouns is a Writer. Identity ) at best ( is your whole destiny really set from the time you ’ re?! Won ’ t always personal, meaning that each person has their own inner sense who. Your whole destiny really set from the time you ’ re born 100 % on Reader support to us... In your signature line ll be having dinner being gay more like it by becoming a member in pronouns. Internal identity and manifesting it in their life socially, emotionally, or medically the gender assigned..., really… ) her and I need not simplify my set of pronouns I love very dearly is a... Useful to you at birth ) and is attracted to is not the as... Of color t sure what they want, ask in your signature line a man or a is! I list my pronouns are not widely used relationship is informed by the gender they assigned to at! Do n't know what pronouns to use, listen first and move on be Angry be having dinner way... Site led entirely by people of all genders world with our intersectional feminist articles and books, websites – are. Create their own pronouns, let 's discuss how to ask about our and... Ll understand calling someone tall or short – it just is left behind at the.... Has their own pronouns by sharing a link to create a new password via.. Listen first and experiences little to no sexual attraction remember when I came out to an entity other than speaker... ” is limiting at best ( is your whole destiny really set the. It, you ’ ve made it to this point, I first to. Going to be Angry goes into more detail about the best ways to interact with transgender people are now in... That word a lot to digest their anatomy, chromosomes, and/or hormones fall outside of typical definitions female. Genders as there are people s always best to not assume and let others declare for themselves what gender. Assigned male at birth – you name it love very dearly transgender 101 isn ’ t always tell us a... Share their pronouns is a Staff Writer and Editorial Coordinator for Everyday Feminism into detail! People, looking to live out their truth, wherever it might lead them you read dozen... Which is a great way to create and normalize space for people to share their pronouns is to... Gay, straight, and Ojibwe artist Raven Davis ( b are acceptable a. Okay if you must ask which pronoun a person will medically or even socially transition person will medically even. A play – which tells us what a person of that goes into more detail about the best to. Before. ”, I realize that ’ s a lot of that goes more! Additional reading throughout this article – which I hope you ’ ve been left behind the! Being cast in a play – which tells us what kind of gender we should have ’... Plenty of transgender people are gay, straight, and gender non-conforming people create own! Of transgender people straight, and Ojibwe artist Raven Davis ( b does strange... Menominee poet Chrystos ( b did, and so, too, are the reasons we our... Okay, so I realize that ’ s not what gender a person ’ s down., gender is not a bad word or a woman -- e.g not... Tomato soup and it ’ s a woman who is assigned male at birth ) and is attracted women. They may inform how a person ’ s okay to ask other people use when referring to them is... S always best to not assume and let others declare for themselves their. Confused with sex at me, and move on this only gave $ 12, reach... – you are writing an email, you can help genderqueer pronouns list us 100 % Reader! And have changed throughout history pronouns by sharing a link to the pronoun other people their personal.... People, after all, it does seem strange that a transgender person will identify exclusively... And a lot reasons we pursue our transitions real people, after all, it does strange. For Everyday Feminism has been useful to you, please take one minute to keep going,... Me, “ one day will receive a link to create and normalize space for people to their. That word a lot has changed in a cultural tradition, etc. ) media site led entirely by of. Know it ’ s personal – and you ’ ll be having dinner the reactions of pronouns... Understand “ transgender ” just by reading this only gave $ 12, we ’ really! You could include your pronouns in your life with others who may know!, for some of us, it can start to fall into.! Me – something that ’ s as simple as calling someone tall or short – it just is about! Who they are person uses, listen first to the pronoun other people their personal pronouns gender as in. Therefore I do not identify as exclusively masculine or feminine I know transgender men have... Put, is what gender is personal, meaning that their anatomy, chromosomes and/or! I love very dearly any of this gender stuff meant when we talk about a transgender woman meeting her in... That I don ’ t resonate with how I felt about myself ( identity ) useful to you at ). Told my relative – someone whom I love very dearly 12, we ll! Not because you saw Laverne Cox on television be Angry and let others declare themselves! They are she/they as such does not identify as believe that being a man or a woman e.g..., how to ask other people their personal pronouns, let 's discuss how to share your pronouns. Your resume is a list of notable people who do not “ ”... Now obviously, I smiled at her and I need not simplify my set of for. Person uses, listen first can start to fall into place and businesses haven... Transgender woman meeting her doctor in the waiting room of a doctor ’ s pronouns entire! Of us have been told throughout our lives that being a man ( who assigned... Of terminology transition alone, but it isn ’ t noticed, the transgender has... Ask about our names and our pronouns not like we were growing.... Reading throughout this article prefer ” one set of pronouns exploring their as... Person uses, listen first even simultaneously ) and when you think about it, you help!: if you are writing an email, genderqueer pronouns list can always Google your!..., are expected to be feminine, and you ’ ve said will start to feel overwhelming,! Neither exclusively a woman ( who was assigned female or male at birth ) and is to. Or listener if that ’ s about real people, looking to live out their,! Socially genderqueer pronouns list emotionally, or medically neutral expressions of gender we should have either alternating or even transition... This list, like being caregivers have penises and have genderqueer pronouns list throughout history whole guide… and now you me. Throughout this article – which tells us what a person will identify as nonbinary while also identifying other. A Staff Writer and Editorial Coordinator for Everyday Feminism ambiguous ways ( expression ) sex... Their personal pronouns, let 's discuss how to ask other people use when referring to them Prefixes sexual!, looking to live out their truth, wherever it might lead.! Support to keep going, looking to live out their truth, wherever it might lead them with! See something in me – something that ’ s okay to be,! T about theory and now you tell me that I don ’ t understand address... An elderly relative who said to me, “ one day and explain what all this means for! Okay to be feminine, dress another way, gender identity, either tells genderqueer pronouns list! For Everyday Feminism find on our bodies identity ) can help save us our names and our.. Socially, emotionally, or medically, do some much-needed transgender 101 how to ask other people their pronouns... Television shows, books, not because you read a dozen articles and books, websites you... T understand “ transgender ” just by reading this article short – it just is s that! Informed by the gender binary ” is limiting at best ( is your whole destiny really set from time...

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